Grief as our neighbor

There they go again. No matter how many instances have occurred, there they are. Showing up at our doorstep.

Who is that? Oh, it’s grief again…

The neighbor that shows up whether you anticipate it or not. Whether you feel like you have prepared for loss or not. The neighbor, eventually, will come. No matter how many damn times it has visited you.

Sometimes, grief will comfort you. Through images, sounds, memories, and writings.

Sometimes, grief will hit you so hard that you think you got uppercut on the chin. Leaving you unsteady and questioning, “What in the hell just happened?”

Sometimes, we will push grief away. “Get away from me!” No matter how many times we scream at it to go away, it comes back. With more intensity and strength than it did before.

Sometimes, we will run away from grief in various ways for periods of time.

Eventually, that neighbor catches up with us again. As we may feel a slight pressure on our chests. Grief will gently say, “Hi there. I saw you were trying to ignore me. I’m still here.”

When we can look at our loss from a place of non-judgment towards ourselves, allowing whatever physical feelings and utterances to come out, this is how we can heal.

Does this mean that we will be whole again? Honestly, no.

We will always carry the holes of who and what we lost. A piece of us will be missing, even after “time has passed.” We might even question through “what if’s?” from time to time.

Grief may not come around as much as it does at first. Well, more like maybe and maybe not. It just depends.

Grief will be our neighbor throughout life. Whether they live near or far, grief will always be our neighbor at some point.

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