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Damned if you do or don’t

Damned if you do
Damned if you don't
Damned if you will
Damned if you won't

Some people look out at someone and their home
Seeing how terrible it is
Observing how terrible a person is
Yet, they have many nicks, scratches, and broken windows
In their own abode

You try to help
You try to understand
Yes, you get blamed for everything
To the moon and back again
Making you question
"Is this worth the pain?"

The more you do, the worst the lashes get
Across the head, heart, and soul
Cutting so deep that you can see skin cut through the epidermis
Crying while asking, "Is it even worth this?"

Even though it'll be 23 years in September
Since my biological father has been gone
Yet, I think some people still remember
Now, I'm carrying his shame, his blame from others
It becomes, to some, my song
Not requested. Never asked.

I see and understand why he drank so much
It's to cover up the shame and blame from those who loved him
He felt like the odd person out
To ease the pain and suffering he went through
I understand now, more than ever
And I say, "I love you."

Does this justify his behavior of being abusive?
Absolutely not
This not condoned
Where was everyone else?
When they knew it was happening?
Inside the literal and figurative "happy home?"

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